Is Grace-Based Discipline Permissive?

Crystal Lutton has written an article comparing GBD (grace-based discipline) with TCS (Taking Children Seriously) and NCP (non-coersive parenting).

Of TCS and NCP, she says, "these philosophies are insidious with problems, and it is often the results of these approaches to parenting that create homes of permissiveness and the child-centeredness that punitive experts warn against."

Read the complete article here.

Montessori ch 16

Maria Montessori Her Life and Work by E. Mortimer Standing
Chapter 16 - The Prepared Environment

Children have absorbent minds to soak in knowledge from birth to six years, so there's no reason to put off learning to read and write, as long as it's done in the context of a prepared environment. Adults see all the progress that a child makes and then conclude that he's finally ready to be educated at age seven. But, in a prepared environment, the child's absorbent mind can easily absorb reading and writing at age five or six. A prepared environment is especially necessary in these days when children don't have gardens to grow up in and their homes are set up for adults. In a prepared environment, children can reach everything and help themselves. Everything is safe - no bees to sting, no rocks to fall on.

Besides child-sized furniture, a Montessori prepared environment needs things to practice life skills (like brooms), sensory materials (like color boards), cultural lesson materials (timelines, math manipulatives) and whatever is necessary for religious development (I have no clue what that would include!) A child's need for order means that everything should have a place and things should be where the child expects them to be. Children like this environment so much that they naturally maintain it, even cleaning up their own messes. The cultural lesson materials are used more with older students. The teacher is available and accessible to help when needed. She is 'the dynamic link' between the child and the prepared environment. Without her, the environment is wasted. An ideal Montessori classroom has 30-40 children. They'll naturally cluster in small groups and work together and learn from each other.

When the child has developed beyond his need to coccoon himself in the limited environment, he'll naturally want to broaden his horizons, but he'll still have some need for the prepared environment.

There's a list of 14 things the teacher is responsible for:
1 keep the area tidy and clean
2 add touches of beauty
3 show how to use the materials
4 connect the child to the environment, then move out of the way
5 watch to see who needs help
6 come when called
7 listen and respond to children
8 don't interrupt working children
9 don't correct a child making a mistake
10 let children rest if they want
11 continue offering materials
12 be a loving but inobtrusive presence
13 be accessible but not in the way
14 be invisible to children offering work to God (?)

Read the next part of this series, or start at the beginning.
CM's Letter to the Editor regarding Montessori

Multi-Purpose

It's not just an unused household attachment --


It's a vaccuum cleaner for role-model play.




It's a horsey!





But, more than that . . .


it's a friend.




(I didn't get the pictures of her cooing over it and kissing it!)


And another sling-turned hula-skirt picture:

Montessori ch 15

Maria Montessori Her Life and Work by E. Mortimer Standing
Ch 15 - The Fundamental Problem in Education

The author lists some of the suggestions offered by critics for improving education - more teacher pay, more activity, better buildings, etc., but none of those seem to help education get any better. (Oddly enough, he doesn't mention anything about ideas, or knowledge, or books!) Maria Montessori saw the problem as being rooted in the relationship between teacher and child. Relationships based on oppressers and the oppressed can never work, and teachers can't seem to unlearn the concept of lording it over their weaker pupils! Why else do teachers have the attitude that they need to mold students and tell them what to learn? Like all other oppressed classes of people - women, slaves, workers - children needed to be liberated in a revolution. She felt that children had the right to be independent in doing for themselves, to be able to move freely instead of being forced to sit still, to explore without being reprimanded for getting dirty, to have access to a suitable working environment. She wrote about this in her book, The Secret of Childhood.

If parents and teachers had to be subjected to living where everything was too high and too big, and their treasures were flung away because they were deemed dirty or worthless, and they couldn't decide what to do for themselves, they'd understand what abuses children have to deal with. The solution is for adults to learn to see children in a whole new light.

I think Maria made a good point that children are people and that adults should try to see things from their perspective. But Charlotte Mason had already found the perfect balance between the need to view children as people and not to hinder them in body, mind or soul - and yet not overlook their need for guidance and good habits and a sense of their duty to others. Since I already know about her perfect balance, it's hard to read Montessori without reacting to her lack of balance. Seeing children as persons who didn't need someone telling them what to do, and providing an artificial environment where everything is sized for them can't solve all the problems of education. Human nature tends to take the path of least resistance, and Montessori doesn't address that. Charlotte Mason wanted children to strive to be better people; Montessori seems to think they already were perfect and just needed adults to stay out of their way. I think a Montessori perspective might mesh well with a TCS/non-coersive view of parenting, but it doesn't mesh well with a Christian worldview.

Start at the beginning of this series or go to the next chapter.
CM's Letter to the Editor regarding Montessori

What We're Listening To

One of our very best friends, artist Tom Root (he and his wife Peggy helped plan out the artist rotation for Ambleside Online) has recorded a CD! We've been listening to it for the past few weeks, and we love it! And now it's for sale at CD Baby! CD Baby describes it as "Southern eclectic jazzy folk/popster; Root crafts interesting well-written songs with expressive, tasteful arrangements."

You can even hear samples of all the songs at the site. My favorite is Happy Girl. We happen to know the girl, and she's just as happy as the song says. :)

You can also see samples of his art here.

Puddle

or, What to Do with a Rainy Day


or, What Happens When it Rains on a Gravel Driveway

Commonly Heard These Days

Miss M: "I'n not Mahmahndah. I'n Tistopher Wobbin."

So there you have it. We may have to start calling her C.

There's more. After a little tantrum, I asked her brother to get a tissue to wipe her little nose. And she screamed, 'It's NOT a little nose! It's a teapot!"

Another M-ism - "bloo-blooey" It's what she calls blueberries.

And she calls her friend Anhelika, "Ahn HEDD uh luh"

And then, there's the way she reads books. I always wondered what she was hearing as I was reading to her. Now I know. One of the books is an old Sunday-schoolish book, and there's a picture of a little boy and his dog looking out at a window and it's raining, and the text says something about God speaking to our hearts when it's thundering and saying, "Don't be afraid."

Her rendition is, "Awww, don't be afraid of the window!"

I don't think I'll ever be able to read that book with a straight face again!

Today's Tea

The one thing we've done really well at keeping up this school year is teatime on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Miss M is learning how to drink from a cup (she uses a Fisher Price plastic teacup and saucer) and she's starting to really eat. When we started, I would put a couple of things on her little plastic saucer just for her to play with, but now she gets a real plate and she eats more than she plays with, and she drinks three half-cups before she gets bored and pours the rest on the table or sticks her fingers in it. Progress! Just a few weeks ago, I'd only put a half teaspoon at the bottom of her cup.

We found a tea that's become our favorite - Bigelow's Vanilla Caramel. I've had a hard time finding it in my area, so I actually bought a couple boxes of it on ebay! I use one teabag of that, and a French vanilla teabag (I can find that anywhere, so I'm adding it to stretch the vanilla caramel) in a pot of tea. Everyone loves it, the boys like it with half soy milk. I haven't exhausted my search for a place that sells the Vanilla Caramel in my area, so I still have hopes of finding a local source.

Being Feb 2, we watched Groundhog Day with Daddy last night. We have an edited version, and we've watched it every year. It's one of the few family traditions we have. First it was just the adults, this is the first year the boys saw it. So teatime today was spent with the boys re-playing dialog from the movie.

I found a way to get Miss M outside for a little while every day - I pay her big brothers a quarter every ten minutes to take her in the backyard. I know, it's terrible, but they like the opportunity, and they're young and can handle more chasing! In the spring, she'll be a little more settled and it'll be warmer. I hope to be able to sit out with her a lot more. I'm not really much of an outdoor person. I remember my parents telling me as a kid to get my nose out of a book and go outside and play. Miss M loves to be outside. She's never ready to come back in, and cries when her brothers bring her in the house. But she's a real handful! We have no fence and she wants to go everywhere, and she's not very easy to interest in anything that might keep her in one place. She really needs a fenced-in area.

Waldorf

I hear Waldorf and Montessori mentioned together a lot (maybe they both appeal to free-thinking parents wanting a gentle, free learning experience for their children?) My only knowledge of Waldorf is that they use a lot of fairy tales, encourage free expression and believe that children should only play with toys made of natural materials like wood or fabric. Someone on the GCM parenting message board posted this Waldorf Critics site about Waldorf and its founder, Rudolf Steiner. I never knew it was founded on occult, karma and reincarnation.

Some quotes from the site: "Since the beginning, Waldorf schools have kept parents in the dark about the real intention of Waldorf education, which is to guide the reincarnation of the children's souls."

"Many Waldorf children are not immunized, and those parents who support immunization may be harshly judged. Steiner believed that certain diseases help children work out problem areas left over from their past lives."

"Waldorf is not just an 'alternative' education; it is a front for Anthroposophy. Anthroposophy has many of the characteristics of a cult, and the schools are the missionary arm of Anthroposophy."

Here's Ours!

Details at The Common Room, it's our Word Cloud.

Edit: This is our 250th post. Hooray! We're already 1/4th of the way to quadruple digits...