Raising Your Spirited Child Part 4 (of 5)

Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka

Part 4 - Socializing with Spirit

That's clever, how each Part begins with "___ with Spirit." But I'm getting tired of it. ;)

This section has tons of practical help for helping a spirited child succeed in public - at Grandma's for Thanksgiving, at the playground, on vacation. I've never thought of any of my kids as especially spirited, but I can see how some of the situations and suggestions apply to us. A lot of the tips read as if they came straight from Jane Nelsen's book Positive Parenting. There are many of the same tactics, and I would recommend the book if you're looking for creative solutions to working through behavioral problems.

Sprited children don't always know they're being socially ill-mannered when they talk too loud, express emotions too forcefully, or infringe on other people's personal space by getting too close. They need help identifying boundaries and proper behavior, and then doing it. There are specific suggestions for learning to share, handle teasing, and resolving conflict with words instead of physical fighting.

On vacations, it's best to have realistic expectation and plan well. Holidays and vacations can be stressful in themselves, so we're stressed when our spirited kids need us most. They may be expected to wear uncomfortable dress clothes, sleep in unfamiliar places, deal with crowds, and eat new foods. It helps to plan less activities so there's more time for down time. Children may need very specific instructions on how to enter a room and politely greet everyone. They may also need to practice receiving gifts so that they respond appropriately if they get overly-excited, or if they're disappointed.

School can be a great experience, or a disaster. Use your power of choice to select the best schooling option, whether it be a particular school in the county, a private school, or homeschool. Find a classroom that fits your child, the place where he will be treasured for being himself. Share what your child is like with the teacher. Tips are given about how to effectively communicate with your child's teacher.